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Expert Q&A
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| By Susan Bartell Licensed Psychologist | ||
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For the last two months, my 4-year-old daughter has been waking up at night and coming upstairs to our room. She says she canŴ sleep, and we promptly carry her back to her own bed. This happens on a regular basis, and sometimes more than once a night. She does not seem frightened or scared, but is unable to go back to sleep. What can we do?
It is likely that your daughter is just going through a "growing up" period. Sometimes children start to have vivid dreams or they become more aware of night noises that may awaken them. There is a good chance that she will outgrow it on her own. However, there are some things you can do to help her along. Although you are doing the right thing by taking her straight back to her bed, you will have greater success if you tell her that she shouldn't come into your room at night. Explain that if she wakes up, she should roll over, close her eyes again and go back to sleep. You'd be surprised how quickly this can work. Some young children are so accustomed to seeking out their parents when they wake up that they don't even consider the option of going back to sleep again.
In order to keep her in her bed when she wakes up, give her some "happy" thoughts to imagine, or suggest that she try counting to 100. You can even give her a small flashlight to keep next to her bed for security.
If she still comes into your room at night, you should try sending her back to bed without your assistance. This will reduce the "fun" of having you giving her extra attention during the night (of course if you feel it would be unsafe to have negotiate the stairs alone, you will not be able to do this). If she realizes that she will have to put herself back to bed, she may stop coming to you.
If all else fails, make sure that she hasn't had too much to eat or drink to close to bedtime. Also consider whether she is being put to bed to early and it not tired. Putting her to bed an hour later, may be enough to change her sleep cycle and get her to sleep for longer stretches. Also, try cutting out any naps during the day, and making sure she gets enough exercise each day.
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