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Expert Q&A
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| By Elizabeth Pantley Child Behavior Expert Better Beginnings, Inc. | ||
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My 3-year-old is scared of dogs. What should I do?
This fear of dogs is your daughter's instinctive way of protecting herself. As she gets older, and learns more about the world, this fear will fade away. In the meantime, you're right that you shouldn't tease her about her fear, trivialize it or force her to confront dogs that scare her on her own. Instead, use some of the following solutions to help your little one move past her fear.
Acknowledge your daughterø feelings, "I know you don't like big dogs." Encourage her to talk about the reasons that sheø afraid, and discuss the logical reasons that demonstrate that sheø safe. Your daughter can learn that it's OK to be afraid, but she doesn't have to be immobilized by the fear.
Don't buy into the idea of a sink-or-swim showdown. Allow your child to overcome her fear one small step at a time. Start by petting a puppy, visiting a pet store, or watching a dog show on television. Progress to a short visit with a bigger, friendly dog that is tightly controlled by the owner. See if you can't visit one of the neighbors and their dog for a while so that your daughter can get to know the pet in a controlled environment before she is expected to play in the yard while the dog is running lose.
Make sure that you are comfortable with the dogs your daughter will be around. Big dogs that are exuberant can unintentionally hurt children by jumping on them or mouthing them. Itø possible that one of these situations have caused your child to be fearful of dogs.
Once you are confident that the dog you are around is safe, respond to your daughterø concerns in a calm, unimpressed manner. Show your daughter that you have no fear that she will be harmed, and she will learn to trust you and become less fearful herself.
Read books that will give your child information about dogs. Knowledge can often conquer fear. Dogs will become more familiar, and familiarity will reduce fear.
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