- my iParenting
- quick clicks
- preschoolers today articles
- preschoolers today q&a
- children today articles
- children today q&a
- message boards
- research baby names
- prepare a birth plan
- content channels
- ip channel rss feeds
- read birth stories
- read parenting stories
- recommended books
- e-newsletters
- safety recalls
- ip diaries
- ip store
- mom of the month
- dad of the month
- editor's letter
- letters to the editor
 |
- e-newsletters
- Sign up to receive our free weekly e-newsletters
- award-winning products
The iParenting Media Awards program helps parents find the best products for their families.
Expert Q&A
 |  |  |
| By Harriet S. Worobey, M.A. Early Childhood Educator Director, the Nutritional Sciences Preschool | ||
 |
A child in my daycare cries often at minor instances and demands that his mother be called to get attention. How can I get him to stop creating situations where he feels that he needs to lose control?
I'm sure you realize that yours is not an easy question. Many children -- when they are unhappy or in a situation that they can't control -- cry for their security: their mothers. They do not necessarily even want their mothers; it is just their first response. It makes the most sense to try to deal with the immediate situation -- in others words, what is really making him unhappy. Let him know that you understand that he is unhappy. Try to acknowledge his feelings. ("I know that it makes you sad when it's cleanup time.") Then let him know what the rule is and the rationale for it. ("But now it's time to put the toys away, so that we can have snack.") Then try to give him two choices, so that he can have some control. ("Would you like to help me find all the square blocks to put away or would you like to help me dress the baby dolls?") Try to reinforce him when he gains control. If he is way out of control, you can have him sit on your lap until he calms down, but then do have him participate in clean up, if only putting one object away. I would also touch base with the parents and find out what his behavior is like at home. Does he do this for them? And what is their reaction? If they just give in every time he cries, your job is much harder. I would then try to discuss having a consistent policy at home and at school. If the issue is truly separation from Mom, I would try to find some stories or puppet shows to do during circle or reading times that could help acknowledge those feelings. I hope these suggestions are helpful. Good luck!!"
Related Expert Q&A
- What can I do to help ensure that my daughter is potty trained in order to start preschool?
- My 4-year-old daughter recently started preschool and she won't play on the playground with the other kids during recess. How can I help her want to participate?
- My 4-year-old runs away from me when I pick him up from preschool. How do I handle this?
- My son starts preschool soon. I am having a hard time teaching him things he needs to know. He gets very frustrated. What should I do?
- A child in my daycare cries often at minor instances and demands that his mother be called to get attention. How can I get him to stop creating situations where he feels that he needs to lose control?
More Answers by this Expert
- We have two boys and are expecting another baby in April. What is the best way to share the news with them?
- What are some signs of stress to look for in a child's behavior when dealing with the death of a family, friend or relative?
- Is it OK for preschool-age children to drink high protein drinks for breakfast?
- I tried to interview a preschool teacher once, but she was too busy with the kids. Should I just forget interviewing her since she is obviously so focused on the kids?
- How do I ease separation anxiety in my child when I drop him off at preschool?
