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Dry Days Ahead

Helping Special Needs Children Learn to Use the Toilet

By Lyn Mettler

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That's what works for 42-year-old Tina and her 10-year-old son, Tyler, one of Carothers' students. "He's got a routine," says Tina, who lives in Charleston, S.C. "He pretty much goes to the bathroom the same time every day." And, she says, Tyler, who has Down syndrome and is autistic, hasn't had a urinary accident since he was 5, though he does still occasionally have bowel accidents.

Carothers also makes sure her students know when they will have the opportunity to use the toilet. She tells them every morning when they'll be going to the bathroom and encourages them to let her know (through a picture symbol, as most of her students do not speak) whenever they need to go and that it's okay to just get up and go themselves. "I just get so excited when one of them signs to go the bathroom and goes," she says.

Accidents Happen
When "accidents" happen, don't make a big deal of it. "If they do have an accident, I don't want to make a spectacle or embarrass the child," says Carothers. Instead, she matter-of-factly tells them to go get cleaned up and change their clothes.

Most schools and daycares are prepared to handle this situation and, in fact, deal with it on a daily basis. So wet pants shouldn't keep your child from doing any activity. Most will simply ask parents to send a change of clothes for just such a situation.

Carothers finds that the kids don't like having to go through the hassle of getting up, going to their locker, changing their clothes and cleaning themselves. "They get to where they don't like it, so they don't want to wet themselves," she says. Again, she encourages the same routine at home. "Be patient. Most children will be toilet trained, but they have to experience some level of discomfort with it."


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